As a business coach, I consistently work with people on their relationships. More often than not, I find myself working with my clients on their most important relationships, whether they be business, personal, or past relationships where there has been pain and hurt.
I’ve found it is our relationship with ourselves that people struggle with the most, and this gets in the way of true connection with others. In reality, we are having a relationship with ourselves and including others in it. It’s really never about the other person, although it may look that way.
How do I know this?
I’ll share with you a personal story of the significant love relationships in my life.
The first relationship I was in was very abusive. My partner always told me what I was doing wrong, how awful I was, and how everything was my fault. I’ve learned since that he was just reflecting back my standards, and my own thinking that was inside of me.
The next relationship was with a lovely man. This person truly loved me for who I was, but he didn't give to me physically or emotionally. I realize now that it wasn’t him; I wouldn’t allow him or anyone to give to me emotionally. I thought then that the way to get love was to do everything myself, be an overachiever, and not receive anything because energy was dangerous.
Now I’m in my third serious relationship. In this relationship I’ve received admiration, full support, and love in so many forms. This is because I can love myself so much more. I don’t have to do it all. I can give and receive freely, and that is showing up in the relationship.
Relationships with others really start with the relationships with ourselves, our own thinking, and how much energy we can receive. Relationships are a part of our souls journey: they show us our blind spots and our unconscious beliefs. Relationships give us the chance to rewrite our own story and change how we see the world.
When we get to the point when we really can be open to give and receive love, there is nothing more magical. It’s what we all long for. This open energy exchange is what my life’s work is all about.
I love talking to people about relationships and would be delighted to dive more deeply into energy and relationships with you. Stay tuned for more on the topic of relationships in the coming months.
Lots of love to you,