Blog
Thoughts, reflections, and letters for people at a crossroads in work and life.
She Already Knew
She sat across from me, hands folded in her lap, and told me about her boss.
He was angry. He was unprofessional. She had a long list of evidence, and she delivered it with the certainty of someone who had been building her case for a long time.
She wanted to go to HR. She wanted to file a complaint. She wanted to quit. Three plans. All of them pointed at him.
All Of Her Energy Was Pointed At Him
Futile
I found myself inside an emotion I didn't recognize. It wasn't despair. It wasn't fear. It was something new.
For a year and a half, my business had been in a season I didn't expect. I kept telling myself to stay open. Stay trusting. Stay generous. Nothing shifted the way I thought it would.
I was sitting with Sarah McCrum. She invited us to notice what was present. That's when it surfaced.
I tried different names. Hopelessness came close but didn't land. Helplessness — too familiar, wouldn't settle.
Then the thought arrived, simple and flat: Nothing I do makes a difference.
It hit like a dull bite. That's when the word came.
Futile.
Burnout Before It Breaks You: One Lawyer's Story
She came to me because she was exhausted. A high-performing woman. A lawyer. Always on. Nights. Weekends. A nervous system that never shut down. On the outside, she was capable and respected. On the inside, everything felt loud and urgent. She told me she wanted to do work in a new way — though she didn't yet know how. She only knew the current pace wasn't sustainable. This is what burnout looks like before it breaks you.
Understanding How We Have Our Experience